Ruby unlike a Ruby

I picked up the pieces of the broken tumbler, trying to decipher why i didnt feel angry at Ruby. There are so many things going wrong in my life right now, and Ruby was at the bottom of the list. That to her, is unacceptable, and so she threw tantrums. This morning, she had come spoiling for a fight.

"Joshua  i am here for the money" she had said coming into my room.
"good morning to you too Ruby" i had replied looking up from the book i was reading. Said book is in shreds right now.
"i don't have time for your sarcasm this morning. today is Saturday. The last Saturday of the month, so please give me money for my hair". she had said striking a pose like she expected a fight. I stood up, went to my wardrobe and brought out my last three thousand naira, home and abroad.
"this is all the money i have in this house. here take two thousand let me hold one thousand" i said stretching the money to her.
looking at me with all the contempt she could muster she asked,"What i'm i supposed to do with two thousand? did i tell you i want to go to a  barber's shop?"
     
I stood up and walked towards her, hands outstretched. pulling her close,i stroked her hair, which still looked good to me by the way. "My love, you know how bad things have been for me since i lost my job. just manage this one for now".
 she pushed me away from her, and eyed me up and down.
"can  you see how you are insulting me? you know the least weavon i can buy is ten thousand naira and that to fix it on is three thousand naira, then you stare at me with two miserable thousand naira?"



"You know that when i had a job, i gave you between thirty and fifty thousand monthly for your hair and other things. those ones you have been buying, can be used many times. just take one of them and fix it again. this is all i have left on me" i replied.

" of what use are you to me if you cant cater for my needs?" she asked spitefully. "you want me to go around, looking unkept. i don't care where you get the money, but i'm not leaving here until you give me money" she walked to the bed and sat down.

"You know i love having you around."i said settling back on the chair and picking up my book. Ruby jumped up from the bed, grabbed the book and tore it in two halves " You think im joking with you ehn Josh''

"what is the meaning of this nonsense Ruby?" i asked angrily
"me nonsense? me Ruby nonsense. i will show you nonesense"with that she walked to the dresser, picked up the innocent tumbler, aimed for my head and threw it. i ducked and it hit the wall and fell to the ground shattering. She looked at me, hissed and walked out.
       

So here i am picking up the shads of glass, not particularly mad at Ruby. You see I met Ruby about eighteen months ago, at a conference where i was sent to represent my firm.... scratch that. My former firm. And Ruby was representing her firm there too. Notice the absence of former. Yup my darling girlfriend does have a job. Not just a job, but a good job at a multi national company. In fact she just recently got promoted to assistant branch manager. But as usual for women, some women ....she still chose to make my life a living hell,whenever it suits her.
 
      Don't get me wrong, i don't have any problems, fulfilling my duties as the man in her life, it is a responsibility i take VERY seriously. But when i hit a rough patch, like i'm currently hitting... She needs to cut me some slack. Considering that before this time, i catered to her whims. And Ruby has had a LOT of whims.
Take for example, her birthday earlier this year. My darling insisted on having a party at Trapezium. This is an event center that costs 1.5 million naira, for a day. I tried to talk some sense into her, all what she said was. "I am not going to have my party anywhere else. its my 25th and you  know that is very important baby. you always say i deserve the best, this is the time to prove it".
I had planned on having a few friends over, for a cosy gathering, and going down on one knee with a stunning diamond. Don't tell her that. But she insisted on a loud party with over two hundred guests, in an event hall that is used for weddings of governors and presidents, so she got what she wanted. at the end of the party, she was sulking. We both knew why she was sulking and i'm sure you do too.
 I spent about three million naira on her birthday two months before i lost my job and today she wanted to cause me grievous bodily harm because she wants to make her already made hair.


          "KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!!!" The sound ripped me away from my thoughts. In walks Bimbo or Shantel as she tells all the men she meets. Bimbo is a gorgeous.. enough said...... ehn i know what you are thinking.  Believe me, she is all that. U know that song " she carry front! she carry back" its incomplete because Bimbo also carry side.
Anyway in walked Bimbo, carrying one of those bags women carry that has things with which they can survive for days.
"Josh how far na. What are you up to?" she asked sitting on the bed. Bimbo is one of the few people that come to my place and heads straight into my bedroom like she owns the place.
"I'm fine dear, trying to clean up the mess my madam made" i said throwing the broke pieces into a bin.
"Are you both up to it again? I saw her driving out as i was coming in, she no even answer my greeting. i was hoping against hope that she came and cooked, but the kitchen is empty." She said looking at me like she expected a answer.
"why are you looking at me like that?" i asked her
"why is there no food? have you had lunch?" she asked
" i haven't even had breakfast yet and you are talking of lunch. You like food too much" i said picking up the book and checking if it can be salvaged.

 Bimbo looked at me and cleared her throat." so what was the fight about today?" she asked.  "don't call it a fight. its just her usual tantrum. She wanted money for her hair, and i didn't have enough money to satisfy her. so she threw the tumbler at me and tore this book"  i said holding up the book. " haba! she threw it at you? anyway why cant she make her hair with her own money at least for now? she earns a lot" Bimbo exclaimed.
       
 I shook my head at her, and settled back in my chair. Bimbo brought out her phone and began doing whatever it is women do on their phones all day. It was in that position that Ruby met us.

"Ehen! this is it na, this is the reason why you act like i neither exist nor matter." she said startling us. Bimbo looked up from her phone, and went right back to it. " what is it again Ruby? i thought you have gone, have you come to give me a second round?" i asked her.

Bimbo did not even act like there was anything going on in the room. " You see how you make people disrespect me? see how she's just acting like i'm not talking? Ruby you have suffered. what nonsense" Ruby shouted facing Bimbo.
At this, Bimbo looked at Ruby and said " You better watch your mouth. i am not Josh and i would not take insults from you."

"Joshua can you hear her? Bimbo i need you to leave this house this minute. I don't want to see you hanging around my man anymore. keep your friendship to yourself" Ruby screamed. B
 Bimbo smiled, stood up picked up her bag. " I'm so sorry that such a good man is stuck with such a drama queen. Josh i would see you later. When you finish screaming, go to the kitchen and make some food for your man" Bimbo said, leaving the room

Ruby lets  out a scream like a deranged woman, throwing her phone at Bimbo's retreating back, and misses.Turning back to me, I can tell she is really furious,
"So you have been discussing our relationship with her. i don't blame you....." I watched her mouth moving without hearing a word she was saying. I wondered how our relationship deteriorated to this state. at that point i tried to feel if i could still have any love for her, and i came up short.

 "Josh! Josh! are you listening to me? I just said its over between us" she shouted bringing me back to reality
"Shut the door behind you" i replied.
" What! is that all you have to say?" she asked. I stared blankly at her. She waited a few moments and when she saw that i was not saying anything more, she stomped out, banging all the doors in her wake.
     
  I know i haven't seen the last of Ruby yet. She would be back. For now I would enjoy my solitude.